The Role of Emotional Agility
Feel all the Feels, then Move Forward
Resilience isn’t about ignoring your emotions.
It’s about learning to move through them without getting stuck. That’s the heart of emotional agility: noticing what you feel, without letting it define your next move.
Coined by psychologist Susan David, emotional agility is the ability to face your inner experiences—thoughts, emotions, and stories—with openness and curiosity, while still acting in alignment with your values.
It’s the practice of staying present with what you feel, without letting those feelings take over.
It’s not about being unshakable. It’s about being flexible.
Why Emotional Agility Matters
In times of stress or change, emotional rigidity can lock us into reaction mode. We avoid, deny, or over-identify with a feeling.
Here’s the trap:
Under pressure, many of us resist our emotions—especially the uncomfortable ones. We try to push them away, power through, or distract ourselves. But what we resist… persists.
Emotions are like signals—they carry useful information. When we ignore or fight them, they get louder. Suppressed fear, anger, or sadness doesn’t disappear; it shows up as irritability, withdrawal, exhaustion, or disconnection. When we allow them, they often move through us more quickly.
Emotional agility is the difference between being in the river and being on the bank watching the current. You’re still in it—but you’re not swept away. We can stay grounded, flexible, and responsive—even when things feel turbulent.
This skill helps us reframe emotional pain not as weakness, but as a signal—a moment of data, not danger.
What you resist, persists. What you allow, transforms.
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Below, you will find something to do, read, and watch. I have included one thing to reflect on, a nudge to prompt a resilience practice, and a short thought to reset your resilience. I follow with two sources to continue building your resilience toolkit.
To Do
Reflect:
Where in your life are you resisting an emotion instead of working with it?
Nudge:
- Try a 3-minute body scan: Where are you holding tension? What might that tension be trying to tell you?
- Complete this sentence in a journal (no editing): “Right now, I’m feeling…”
Reset: What you resist, persists. What you allow, transforms.
To Read
“Emotional Agility” by Dr. Susan David
Practical, research-backed, and deeply human—this book walks through how to notice your thoughts and feelings, unhook from old patterns, and live with more clarity and courage.
To Watch
TED Talk: “The Gift and Power of Emotional Courage” – Dr. Susan David
One of the most popular TED Talks on emotion, this talk explores the trap of toxic positivity and the strength in naming our pain.
Next
In our next article, we’ll explore how to build the muscle of self-regulation—so you can pause, reset, and respond even when emotions run high.
